Separation Anxiety & Reactivity: Which Should I Work On First?

Help! Which Should I Work On First?

The overwhelm when a dog has multiple challenges is real! I frequently encourage guardians to pick one to manage (prevent/avoid) and one to focus on so they do not burn out with too much training on their plate at once. 

The answer is.... It depends. Every situation is a little different! Luckily, there are some questions you can ask yourself to determine which issue to address first. 

Can my dog stay with other people comfortably enough to manage absences?

During separation anxiety training it's crucial to suspend scary absences in order to make progress. It is very difficult to teach a dog that being alone is safe if they continue to have unsafe alone time. Your dog will need to be comfortable with the people who will be caring for them when you do have to leave them. 

If your dog needs a lot of time to warm up to people and doesn't currently have people they can stay with, I recommend building their inner circle of caretakers first and foremost! Building positive relationships with others can take time and looks different for every dog. It's best to have a qualified professional help you do this if you are not sure how to go about it or you just want to make sure you are doing it in the best way for your particular dog. Definitely work with a professional if your dog is a bite risk!

If your dog warms up to people quickly or is only reactive to other dogs, I do recommend dealing with the separation distress first. The reason is that on-leash reactivity can be managed in the short term for most dogs by walking in secluded areas, sniffspots, or at night. It is also very common for the dog's reactivity and other problem behaviors to reduce on their own once the separation issues are alleviated! Why make more work for yourself if you don't have to? Usually, when dogs experience separation-related anxiety, they are "on" most of the day monitoring their beloved people for unexpected (to them) departures. When we reduce their overall daily stress level by working on the separation anxiety, working on the reactivity becomes much easier! It's hard for our dogs to improve with their reactivity if their sympathetic nervous system is constantly activated. Many people will also see their dogs get more playful, silly, and generally relaxed as we go through the separation desensitization! The dog is finally able to relax and enjoy themselves! 

Which is most impactful for my life?

Yes, you matter too! If the reactivity is driving you nuts, you don't feel you can avoid triggers, and you are okay with managing absences for a while, by all means, work on the reactivity first. The key piece is managing absences here. Your dog is going to struggle to improve with their reactivity if they are at home panicking every day being flooded with stress hormones and it will leave you feeling frustrated and hopeless. To understand the effects of toxic stress, check out my previous blog post here. 

Just as important as managing absences to reduce overall stress is making sure that all their needs are consistently being met and working on your relationship to foster a secure attachment! Many things fall into place when we have a focus on these things. Your dog can't meet your needs unless their needs are met first and that is our primary responsibility as their caretaker. They are dependents who have no choice but to rely on us for even their most basic needs. Be reliable! You got this!